Here are a few tips to help you re-establish communication with your teen:

🚴‍♂️ Dosomething together without necessarily bringing up the conflict (go for a run, play a sport, go to the movies, etc.).

🗣 Communicate in more relaxed contexts.For example, you can chat while sitting next to each other in the car or while doing chores around the house. This kind of informal interaction is often less stressful for teens and can help ease them into a conversation more gently.

👋 Show initiative. This may mean knocking on their bedroom door and asking them to talk, asking them to do something with you, or talking to regularly. In short, show that you want to re-establish communication by reaching out to them rather than waiting for them to come to you.

👂 Be ready to listen. If your teen opens up to you, take the time to listen to what they have to say and respond with kindness, even if you don’t share their opinion. You can disagree, of course, but do so respectfully. This will encourage your kid to keep talking to you.

For example, don’t say: “I would never let you go out that late!” Instead, say something like: “I understand that you may have felt frustrated by this situation. It wasn’t my intention to frustrate you. I didn’t let you go out for safety reasons.”

🤐 Respect their privacy. Along with listening, discretion is key when your teen confides in you about their challenges and concerns. For example, don’t initiate a  sensitive conversation in front of siblings or other family members, and don’t share little  secrets they’ve told you with the other parent.

ARE YOU WORRIED THAT YOU AND YOUR KID ARE DRIFTING APART AND THAT THEY’RE BECOMING MORE DISTANT?

Maybe your teenager hasn’t completely shut you out, but you feel that they’re confiding in you less and less and “excluding” you from certain areas of their life you used to be a part of. 

This shift is a normal part of typical adolescent development as they begin to discover their own identity, seek more autonomy and socialize more with their peers. In this stage of life, your teen may be more inclined to discuss their worries with friends. 

Here again, it’s important to have an open and attentive attitude, and to be patient. If you accuse your teen of not talking to you, make them feel guilty for preferring the company of their friends to your own, or force them confide in you, you could be inviting conflict and discomfort, which will only increase the distance between the two of you. 

👉 Keep in mind that if you’re going through something similar with your child, the lack of communication isn’t personal, and strong reactions are just how they express their negative emotions. 

The most important thing is for your teen to feel you’re there for them no matter what, and that you support them in expressing their emotions and talking through disagreements.